I'm NOT a christian....

I'm reading this book "The Irresistible Revolution, living as an ordinary radical".... what a great book, Chapter 3 made me weep my ass off! Shane Claiborne writes about the ordinary radicals those who know what being a Christian is t do just what the Bible says....just what Jesus said..." Just have Christ come live IN you" (Gal. 2.20) So now my struggle is... how can I become a REAL Christian? Do I need to leave my comfort zone and let the Gospel mess me up??? I think it already did!! I've got to experience what LOVE means..God gave me the opportunity to open the eyes of my heart and find my passion, I'm not even close to be a Christian...not EVEN close but I'm starting to realize that i have to let Christ live in me. Mother Theresa what an incredible woman of God definitely a true Christian...she followed Jesus, she was Jesus for millions of people, yet she was humble, caring, loving, sweet, yes! she was Jesus and that made her special, that made her being a Christian. I want to be a Christian! I want to be an Ordinary Radical!!!